Dating Advice for Your Widowed Parent

Suggestions from Home Care Experts to Make the Transition from Home Easier

Summer is a favourite time for weddings. The weather is warm, with a sprinkle of rain from time to tome, and the whole earth comes alive after the stillness of winter. It is the perfect time for everyone to go out with a special someone. But for an elderly widowed parent, finding a new companion is not easy. It takes time to leave behind the memories of a partner who has passed and move on with someone else. It is hard for you to imagine that scenario too, isn’t it? Most memories you have are of mom and dad together - working, playing, and building a life with you. It is hard to imagine them with anyone else until one of them leaves the world. How do you react when mom tells you she is “seeing” someone who is not your father? What do you say when dad asks you to meet his new “girlfriend”?

Dating is new territory for everyone. Mom probably feels the excitement of a new relationship. You and your siblings may have feelings of trepidation. There is no need to let a new companion plant a wedge in your relationship with your parent. In reality, companionship is one step in healing an old and lonely heart. At Home Instead, our caregivers can help families through this time of transition with a listening ear and personalized senior care services.

4 Ways to Support A Widowed Parent Looking to Date Again

Your relationship with your aging parent is important. Deciding to date again is a fantastic opportunity to support your mom or dad instead of feeling alienated or making them feel alienated. Here are some suggestions to keep the peace and not wage war:

1. Be considerate: Unless your widowed parent has Alzheimer’s disease or dementia, they are still of sound mind and able to make their own choices. Remember when you started dating and how dad peppered you with questions? Now is not the time to annoy them with your interrogation.
2. Give them freedom: While mom can choose whom she wants to date, it is also good to involve you in her general plans. Ask questions out of genuine interest and support, not out of fear. Mom will be more likely to share details when she is  ready, so you will know when to give it more serious thought.
3. Let them lead their own lives: It is quite a jump from watching dad start a new relationship to hearing wedding bells. You may be concerned about him caring for an ailing spouse yet again. If the person is much younger, that may worry you too. You might want to put your foot down and speak your mind. But that will create unwanted tension between you two. Be gentle instead. Start a conversation early. Ask him where he sees the relationship going and what happens if it gets serious. Discussions now can save heartache later.
4. Caution them about scam artists: Unfortunately, there are people in the world that take advantage of the elderly. Maintain an open and sincere conversation with your aging parent. Let them know your concerns. If they want to use a dating site, help them choose reliable ones.

Professional Senior Care and Companionship for Your Parent

Encourage your elderly parents to get out and meet new people. Companionship comes in many forms, including a professional caregiver. A trusted home care specialist from Home Instead Hamilton can step in to offer support services that will keep mom or dad engaged, active and living independently.