Between the kids’ activities, household upkeep, and for many, the demands of work, life can undoubtedly be overwhelming at times. Add in the responsibility of caring for an aging parent and you could soon feel the fatigue and stress common to the “Sandwich Generation.”
Today, more and more people, sandwiched between their own children and a 65+ parent, are tasked with stepping into dual provider roles: caregiver to an aging loved one and parent or guardian. According to Statistics Canada, the "sandwich generation" now includes more than 2 million Canadians (or 28% of all caregivers in Canada).
If you’re a sandwich generation caregiver, it can be extremely important to know your personal and financial limits and be open to voicing your challenges with family and friends. While it may sound impossible, there are ways to carve out moments for yourself – whether breaks at home or time away, in order to mentally and physically reset. In fact, your health may depend on it. If you’re in a good place with your own wellness, you can be a far stronger care provider for your loved ones.
Here are 5 ways to help manage caregiver stress and survive the sandwich generation press:
- Ask for help when you need it.
Sounds easy, but the reality is we often feel obligated to do it all. If you have young children, ask a friend or family member to pick them up from school or soccer practice or create a carpool. Team up with other parents to swap play dates so you can be kid-free for Mom’s doctor appointment, or for a few hours of me time each week. Don’t feel guilty for making time for yourself. - Create your own home space.
Not every part of the house needs to be dedicated to caregiving. Give your kids and/or your parents their space while you have a room or area of the house to decompress with TV, yoga or listening to music in a comfy chair. Make a wellness appointment for yourself: pencil in times on the calendar to be in this spot every week. - Join a support group.
You are not alone – not by a long shot. With the panini generation becoming more prevalent in recent years, there are many caregiver support groups and resources that can help you manage your role. If no services are available nearby, try joining an online support group or a social media group. A quick search for “family caregiver” brings up a slew of options. - Line up respite care.
Professional care services can offer much-needed respite and ensure your parent or aging loved one is safe while you’re not there. Many care professionals are trained specifically for elder care, helping with personal care such as bathing and other tasks you may not feel comfortable doing and engaging older adults with their hobbies and other fun activities to help them thrive. Care professionals also can provide rides to appointments, cook, help with household tasks, and may be available for ongoing care. Talk with your mom and dad about their options and inquire what government and insurance care benefits they may be eligible for. - Sync with your employer and friends.
If you’re employed, you could let your boss or colleagues know about your situation and caregiving needs. Being transparent can ease stress and help others understand what you need to be at your best. You may also be eligible for Employee Assistance Program (EAP) benefits that could help manage your stress. If you’re a stay-at-home parent or retired, talk to your neighbors and friends about your needs and see if they have similar stories or advice to share.
As a caregiver there may be days ahead when you feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders. It’s okay if you’re not there for everyone, all the time. Really! Colleagues or friends can help hold the fort for you. Kids can watch TV for a bit while you’re dealing with everything. Cut yourself some slack on household chores (better yet, assign some to those kids!). And when you feel you’re ready for help, check out the support that our skilled and experienced care pros can provide.
To learn more about professional caregiving support, or if you know of someone who can benefit from quality care services, contact the health experts at Home Instead – available 24/7
Call 604-432-1139
